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MUELLER: Go in the right direction

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By Bob Mueller

What makes you feel motivated, excited and happy?

What makes you feel peaceful, content and fulfilled? Whatever is working for you, you should strive for a life that offers you more if it.

If your dream became a reality, would it take you in that direction?

Does whatever you’re dreaming of having or doing promise to give you more of what works for you? These are serious questions to begin asking yourself in your quest for true success.

As we move through life and strive toward certain things we think we want, often our desires change.

Possibly we realize that what we thought we wanted wasn’t what we really wanted after all. In fact, in talking with people who have achieved great things, I found many who said that once they achieved their lifelong goal, they felt disappointed and almost depressed.

What looks good in fantasy isn’t always what it is cracked up to be. And sometimes the more we have, the more we want – whether it’s money, success or material things. We lose our perspective even when we truly have enough to live the life we want.

That is why it is so important to enjoy the experience of going after your dream because maybe that will be the best part of the process. And you can spend a great deal of time there.

If you are going in the right direction, time spent in pursuit of your dreams will feel right and enjoyable. In fact, that is one way to tell if you are going in the wrong direction and not following your heart. If you are not enjoying the trip, if you are burned out, exhausted and unhappy in your struggle to achieve your dream, something is wrong.

Maybe you are going about it the wrong way. Possibly you are trying too hard and allowing the universe to work with you. Or you could be subconsciously sabotaging your own success. Or maybe you’re going after a dream you think you want, but in reality, you don’t.

Whatever the reason, burnout and frustration are clear signs that closer evaluation is necessary.

When we are young adults, life to us is like a toy store to a child. It is big, exciting and a bit overwhelming, with lots of choices. Sometimes it tugs at us just to play and have fun. And there are so many choices that it’s easy for us to get sidetracked.

It is hard to stay focused or to be sure of exactly what it is we want. If we aren’t clear about what we want in every area of our lives, we could end up like the little boy, frustrated and sad, wondering why we’re constantly coming up empty handed.

It is so important to know who you are and to know what brings you joy so that you can choose to make it part of your life every day.

The following Personal Bill of Rights should help you clarify your desires:
You have the right to be excited about your life.
You have the right to create an attractive, comfortable home.
You have the right to live wherever you choose.
You have the right to have healthy, rewarding friendships.
You have the right to have romance and passion in your life.
You have the right to be proud of who you are and stay honest with yourself.
You have the right to spend time with and on yourself.
You have the right to find your own spiritual path.

As William Shakespeare so eloquently said:
“My crown is in my heart, not on my head.
Not decked with diamonds and Indian stones.
Nor to be seen: My crown is called content;
A crown it is that seldom kings enjoy.”

Bob Mueller is the vice president of gift planning at Hosparus. The views expressed in this column are those of the writer.